Sidewalks to Nowhere

While the laundry was drying, I decided to take a walk through the neighborhood near our hotel. I had actually been planning on taking a nice, long walk for a couple of days, but the farthest I'd managed to get was the edge of the parking lot.

The neighborhood turned out to be really quiet. It's an older neighborhood, filled with modest one-story homes. I saw people here and there, outside enjoying the day. I said hello to an older gentleman as he was walking back with his mail and made a comment about the weather to a lady who was setting up her sprinkler.

As I walked, I made a conscious effort to stay in the moment. I wanted to forever imprint in my memory the sounds, smells and feelings I was experiencing. I found myself looking up quite often, noticing the blueness of the sky, how fluffy the clouds were and how fast the Texas wind was whipping them across the sky. I enjoyed the feeling of the wind moving my curls around and made no effort to brush my hair from my face. The warmth of the sun, the humidity and the wind combined to make it feel like I was walking through bathwater. In the distance, I could hear the hypnotic sound of cars as they whooshed along the freeway. I heard birds calling out in a bird language I don't recall ever hearing. And there were trees of a variety I've never seen. It all felt very surreal, in a pleasantly numb and unfamiliar way.

I noticed that the sidewalk I was on ended abruptly about 20 feet ahead. I looked around, and there was another one across the street that also ended for no apparent reason. I thought of them as Sidewalks to Nowhere. It's like, originally there was a purpose - someone had a plan to build a sidewalk, but then they got bored or tired or whatever and never bothered to finish. Or they decided that wherever the sidewalk was supposed to actually lead to, it really wasn't worth the effort. Or maybe they never intended to build a sidewalk that actually went anywhere. Maybe the plan all along was for it to end into nothingness. It was all very Stephen King-ish.

I don't know why these Sidewalks to Nowhere are bothering me so much. I wonder what they represent in my life. Maybe paths (sidewalks) I started building at different points in my life that I decided weren't worth the effort. Or maybe there was a trail (sidewalk) I was blazing toward some pipedream that I lost interest in. Or maybe there were times I took a street (sidewalk) just to see what was down there and then decided to turn around without giving it a chance.

I hear it. I hear the sound of Deeper Meaning. It's getting pretty close, but I'm on vacation, so I'm going to go watch tv or play a game or call someone. And (maybe) I'll think about Sidewalks to Nowhere later.

For now, I'm going to make a conscious effort to stop thinking about them.